I am incredibly lucky to live near the beach and also around the corner from Desa Seni a beautiful resort which has a fabulous open air yoga studio and a huge variety of classes. After a recent class I really thought about what a full and rich life is and I realised sadness is ok; really it is!
My current favourite class at Desa Seni is a Yin Yoga class with some Yoga Nidra. The teacher’s background means there is also a fair bit of Buddhist teaching thrown in. For me it’s one and a half hours of bliss. For those who don’t know, Yin Yoga is a slow practise which tends to be floor based. This makes it a perfect time to receive more thought provoking teachings.
So what about this “sadness is ok” malarky?
We all push sadness away; don’t we? . If something awful happens we really resist it in our lives. We push it away and tell ourselves that somehow we are to blame for awful things happening and because they have happened, we are flawed people. That somehow, if we were better or more perfect, we would live a life devoid of sadness. Are you beginning to get the picture. It really is illogical madness.
Sadness is ok; it has to be because, unless we experience sadness we have no perspective. We need sadness to allow us to appreciate the happiness which will also come and go. It was a very powerful teaching and stayed with me for a long time.
It’s Pretty Simple Really !
The words that really stuck were simple, so I will repeat them here for you ‘both happiness and sadness will pass.”.
I just thought yes, “I really feel that”. Whatever the experience it will pass.
Grasping and holding on is particularly true in relation to happiness. We believe that happiness should be held onto for dear life, even if that means squeezing the living daylights out of it. Conversely, sadness should be pushed away. But honestly, sadness and happiness are both ok, both are completely normal and will come and go whatever we do.
We are bombarded with and and naturally drawn to feel good slogans.That’s fine. Creating a positive mindset is really important but sometimes sad things just happen and quite often they are completely out of control. There should be no blame. The same is true of being happy; cultivating gratitude and a positive outlook is going to help but happiness is not something you can catch and hold onto for ever.
If you want to explore this topic a little more here is a really sweet little 10 minute podcast I came across:
Just knowing and appreciating how we feel today, knowing that, whatever it is, it will pass; it’s beautiful really.